Saturday, August 20, 2011

Finally...I hope

We verbally accepted a counteroffer on a house in Dalton yesterday. I started to feel a little excited late last night when I was searching the Internet for rugs. Somehow, that's become a priority. The house needs the floors cleaned and new paint on the walls, but otherwise, it's in move-in condition. The floors are hardwood or laminate throughout and A is hung up on the hard floors and how she'll get hurt if she falls out of bed and how much she loves carpet. That's why we need a rug. Several would be nice but money will be tight when we start paying two mortgages so the only rug that has to be bought is one for A and L's room.

I'm giving up a few things that I love having at this house like a mantle (where will I put our Christmas stockings!?!) and a separate dining room, but I'm trading it for enough space for my family to live, places to put all our things, and a drive to work that's 10 minutes instead of 50. I'm also getting a craft room. The basement has several finished rooms that could be bedrooms but we'd rather everyone sleep together upstairs so we'll sleep in three bedrooms just like we do here and use the extra rooms downstairs for things we've only dreamed about here. There's a large room that will be the "family" room but mostly, it will be the play room. There's a separate room with a closet that will be the office to hide the messy filing cabinet/bookcase, desk, computer and laundry hanger, I mean treadmill. In the bedroom off the hall, I'll have my craft room. I'd never really thought about the fact that I could have a separate room all my own until my husband offered this morning to build shelves in the closet for all my supplies. That's when it hit me. This house will be ours. I've been hoping in my heart for almost a month but I was too afraid to actually plan what each room might be. This is the fourth house that we thought might be right but it's the first one that's truly felt right.

As my husband and I lay in bed talking this morning, I realized why. It has what we need. There's another finished room that's separated from the rest of the basement by an unfinished part. That room has a door to the outside so even though it has nice floors and finished walls, it will belong to my husband along with all of the unfinished space. He'll finally have room for his tools to all live in one space. It's a lot of room but it will be full by the time we move in all the tools he's acquired. I hope it's enough because it's all he's getting. Of course, it's twice the space he has here and it won't force him to park in the driveway so that his tools have a place. Even better, it's under the kitchen/dining area not the bedrooms. He likes to work on projects at night after the girls go to sleep but he's not really able to do that here because the crowded garage at this house is directly under their bedrooms and he makes too much noise.

Even as I write this post, I feel like crying. We've waited so long for something to work out. My husband started working in Dalton almost three years ago. For three years, we've driven 90 miles a day. Our family has aged. Our girls have started having things to do like dance class and swimming lessons. We had another baby in that time. With each passing year, it became harder and harder. I've never admitted it out loud, but I've felt like there were times I was about to break but I couldn't because what good would it do? Even now, I know this move won't make everything perfect. The girls will still fuss with each other. A will still be hard to wake up in the morning even if she gets to sleep an extra 45 minutes. Money will be a bigger issue than it's ever been. We'll have new challenges and problems to face, but, in my heart, I know this is the right decision and I have faith that it will work out. And the cherry on top? I realized this morning that I get a craft room. That was always a room in the dream house I've been building in my head. This isn't my dream house. It doesn't have a library. However, when I look at this house, I know that we can make it our home. I know that we can be happy and raise our children there. When I look at it, I see the possibilities it holds. I see hopes and dreams waiting to be hoped and dreamed. I see my family's future.

(I'm crying for real now.) To all my former students that I love who are reading this: I'll invite you over when it's ready. I'd love to be able to finally share my life with you when we share a hometown. I'll make dessert :) It will involve chocolate.

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